I told myself I wouldn't think about IT while I still am trying to be somebody. But then, it is as if the circumstances lately are forcing me to think very hard about IT. I can't even say what IT is.
So okay, IT might have something to do with the L word. And I hate the fact that I should be thinking about it at this time of my life. I should really be focusing right now on being that somebody that I've always wanted to be. But by force of circumstances, I think I might have to spend some time thinking hard about IT.
What is really IT all about?
Well, to be perfectly honest, after being with someone and getting my heart broken for so many times I still haven't figured out what IT is all about.
All I know now is I need certain things, certain qualities before I can say that this is really IT.
You see, I'd like to believe that I am a special case. And that is not because I am walking around thinking I'm better than others. That's actually far from being the case.
To start off, I have a twisted family history with twisted characters on it. I need someone who could be able to understand that and won't judge me for that. Someone who would be able to accept me despite the fact that I would be pushing him to a bunch of crazies. Someone who could remind me that there is still hope for sanity for me even if I came from the house of crazies. To put it bluntly, I need someone with a strong stomach.
I guess that requirement alone would be enough to help me decide whether I found IT.
Not long ago, I would have said that I need someone who could make me truly happy. But then I've realized that happiness is simply a state of mind. We can actually easily convince ourselves that we are happy in any given situation. It's all in our minds. Happiness is simply a matter of choice.
Instead of looking for someone who could make us happy, I think it would be better if we look for someone who could hold us down whenever we find our lives being shaken. Someone who could pull us out from life's insanity and remind us that the craziness would end at some point. I don't need someone who could make me feel good about myself. I am perfectly capable of doing that by myself. What I do need is someone who would be there when the going gets tough. To put it metaphorically, I need my personal wall in which I can cling to whenever I am being shaken.
And now.. I am being cheesy at this point. =P
Anyway.. I guess that is all I can figure out now. The rest would have to wait.
So okay, IT might have something to do with the L word. And I hate the fact that I should be thinking about it at this time of my life. I should really be focusing right now on being that somebody that I've always wanted to be. But by force of circumstances, I think I might have to spend some time thinking hard about IT.
What is really IT all about?
Well, to be perfectly honest, after being with someone and getting my heart broken for so many times I still haven't figured out what IT is all about.
All I know now is I need certain things, certain qualities before I can say that this is really IT.
You see, I'd like to believe that I am a special case. And that is not because I am walking around thinking I'm better than others. That's actually far from being the case.
To start off, I have a twisted family history with twisted characters on it. I need someone who could be able to understand that and won't judge me for that. Someone who would be able to accept me despite the fact that I would be pushing him to a bunch of crazies. Someone who could remind me that there is still hope for sanity for me even if I came from the house of crazies. To put it bluntly, I need someone with a strong stomach.
I guess that requirement alone would be enough to help me decide whether I found IT.
Not long ago, I would have said that I need someone who could make me truly happy. But then I've realized that happiness is simply a state of mind. We can actually easily convince ourselves that we are happy in any given situation. It's all in our minds. Happiness is simply a matter of choice.
Instead of looking for someone who could make us happy, I think it would be better if we look for someone who could hold us down whenever we find our lives being shaken. Someone who could pull us out from life's insanity and remind us that the craziness would end at some point. I don't need someone who could make me feel good about myself. I am perfectly capable of doing that by myself. What I do need is someone who would be there when the going gets tough. To put it metaphorically, I need my personal wall in which I can cling to whenever I am being shaken.
And now.. I am being cheesy at this point. =P
Anyway.. I guess that is all I can figure out now. The rest would have to wait.
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